Diary of our Lhasa Apso puppy, Robin
Saturday 18th Feb
Mum took me to see Nanny and Granddad today, which was a surprise because after disgracing myself on their carpet last time I didn’t expect to be invited back so soon. They live in a semi-detached bungalow on the edge of Norwich with a nice garden and a conservatory with floor to ceiling glazed windows. Their neighbours have two dogs; one much like me and another called Doug the Pug. I was playing in the garden when I caught sight of Doug the Pug peeping through a gap in the fence. Oh my goodness, what an ugly flat-faced creature, and to be honest a little scary for a small puppy like me. I turned tail and ran back indoors through the open door of the conservatory only it wasn’t the door and I ran head first into the window, much to the amusement of the on looking pensioners. I think Doug the Pug must have done the same thing lots of times. After an experience like that all you can do is crash out on a cuddly doughnut.
Monday 19th Feb
My training programme is going really well. I understand what ‘sit’ means and enjoy the treats this brings, but I fail to understand why I don’t receive a treat every time I sit in front of Mum or Dad. I make eye contact, bound up to them and sit with a very deliberate and positive motion, so they can see I’ve definitely sat. Surely this shows initiative on my part, which shouldn’t go unrewarded. I have also learned ‘down’ and ‘come,’ but I’m unenthusiastic about ‘stay.’ I know exactly what it means – I just can’t be bothered to sit still for more than two seconds at a time.
Tuesday 20th Feb
I like to show affection to the people I love the most by licking their faces! Timing is critical to ensure the most lovable lick. Fix them with strong eye contact and then just as my chosen loved one looks away I go for it with a swift jump and a full-on-the-lips doggy lick. The best time for this procedure is immediately after breakfast when my doggy breath is at its most pungent. Today I scored my first ever household hat-trick, planting a perfect face lick on Mum, Dad and my cat brother Toby. Mum and Dad both recoiled in horror, looking like they’d just unexpectedly eaten an extra strong lemon (rude!) but I’ve no idea what Toby looked like. I decided not to hang around to find out, and got the hell out of there pretty sharpish!
Wednesday 22nd Feb
As regular readers of my dog blog will know, I love my cuddly Mr Fox in a very special way but I have another favourite too; a blue and white rope with tassels on each end. I love to play tug of war and when Dad holds the rope in the air I jump up and hang off it so he ends up holding a rope with an attached dangling puppy. Sometimes when the rope is on the floor I like to bite the end Dad is holding. I know he likes this too because he lets out a little yelp every time I bite his fingers! This evening I noticed a blanket on the end of the lounge sofa with tassels on it. When Mum found me hanging off the end of the blanket I got shouted at. Apparently I'd put a hole in it. Seriously, people, we need some consistency around here. Either I can hang off tassels or I can't?
Thursday 23rd Feb
Yesterday Mum decided that my eyes were a bit puffy, so it was off to the vets. The vet lady poked and prodded me in ways I wasn’t altogether comfortable, especially when she took my temperature. Not an area I would recommend being poked in. The vet said it was nothing much to worry about but decided to put some drops in my eyes anyway, which was very unpleasant indeed. Mum and Dad were presented with a tube of eye drops, and they were advised to apply these twice a day. The vet said that it might be easier to wrap me in a towel when attempting the procedure, and I didn’t fancy the sound of that one little bit. This morning Mum held me while Dad applied the eye drops. I wriggled and thrashed about a bit – just enough to make a protest without risking being doggy-wrapped. However, the evening’s application proved too much and if the IOC should ever decide to make wriggling and thrashing an Olympic sport I’d fancy myself for a gold medal. So, towel wrapped I was! Apparently Mum and Dad intend to repeat this procedure for another four days. If that’s the case someone’s going to get seriously bitten.
Friday 24th Feb
Mum and Dad haven’t had a dog before but they do have a book. A sort of idiot's guide to their new puppy, which is about the right sort of level for them. The book itself was clearly written by an idiot because it recommends feeding the existing pet before the new puppy, which means Toby gets his breakfast before me! Frankly, after almost three weeks of living here I think the pecking order should be reviewed, and to strongly make this point I attempt to make myself look significantly larger than my modest puppy proportions by doing loads of bouncing first thing in the morning. The bouncing is followed by sitting (see Monday 19th) and then the procedure is repeated until breakfast is finally served.
See you next time.
If you've missed the first two parts of my dog blog you can read parts 1 & 2 here: